The Stork's Assistants: Long Delayed Update

BT (Before Tyke) I had compiled a list of 2008 babies, due in March end, I was 9/10th in the list. The Tyke will be four months in a week's time, InshaAllah and I haven't posted a single update since my last the update IV. In fact, I should've been pushed down the expecting list as A, my SiL's bro and SiL had a son early March, but Z, blogger had her baby take her due time in her arrival so I retained my no. 9 spot. Anyways. After update IV:
N has had her twins, a boy and a girl, all fine, hale and hearty...her husband sent me their pics, with their elder son and the new arrivals.
S, my cousin has had a baby daughter early this month, sis sent me an sms also informing me of the impending mommyhood of two more cousins...that takes up the 2008 babies count to 15!
A, SiL, had a baby boy yesterday so hoooray there too. :))
The Tyke is neatly wedged amidst all these arrivals and will have loads of playmates his age...now only if we would make sure that he's around one time or another, with these kids in the list!
Our move to Canuck-land is all set now. We go there mid-August and get some paperwork done by end of September, then return to base and head home to Pakistan (KHI-LHR-KHI) in October/November...finally returning here to see the end of the year. Next year when we fly to Canada, it would be a permanent move, InshaAllah, sometimes in May.
Also I've been thinking up loads of Tyke posts all these months, I just have to make time one of tehse days and commit them all here.

BabyD is getting bigger and bigger day by day... when we first bought his activity center (walker cum rocker cum bouncer with an activity tray) last month, the smallest height was too high for his little feet. We thought it appropriate because we didn't want him to walk just then. We expected him to bounce and rock himself and be involved in his activity tray but we soon found that he thought that we were confining him. He was learning to crawl and getting under almost everything. I found him pulling out my crochet basket (filled with my incomplete shawls and doilies and colorfu balls of thread) one day. He tugged at his tidy bag another day and he got under my dresser, the dinning table and then one evening, rolled off the bed ( I had moved for less than ten seconds). He learned to get out of his rocker and out of his stroller and was getting restless in his crib. That is when we realized, we needed something else to keep him busy. After a little search around town we found the perfect walker. It was an activity center and it had lots of little things to keep him busy. But after the first day, BabyD understood that his mum and dad were confining him. He was literally stuck there... he had teethers and rings that he could pull at but he didn't want too. He had a rubber ducky and a little blue elephant but that only made him blue and anything he touched made a sound. It irritated him and made both his parents and him, anxious. We decided to place him in his walker for only a few minutes everyday so that he could get a hang of it. It worked to the extent that he sat in it for 15minutes. And then, two weeks after we bought it, I removed the pad from under his feet just so that he could feel that he had a little more control. I converted it to a rocker and let him rock... it didn't work and so, one day while working in the kitchen I converted it to walker again and pushed and pulled at him around me. He stopped wailing and looked around. From then on, everywhere that mummy went, BabyD took her there! I would put him in his walker and we would play choo choo train. I would push on his walker and he would coo and babble and enjoy the ride around.

Last week, I placed BabyD in his walker when I came online and after a little 'quiet' time, I hear D exclaim, "Umm... aye..". I looked around to see that he was excited because he was moving. He was pushing at the ground with his little toes and that was sending the walker moving in the opposite direction. He was moving... he was mobile and he had discovered that! For once I had my camera ready and on hand to capture my sons first steps. He could only move in reverse for the first two days but now he moves around the room in all directions. It is not actually walking but he moves and that is beautiful. To me BabyD being mobile means that he now pulls on drawers and tugs on table covers and bedsheets and picks stuff off tables... it means that I have more reasons to not come online because I need my eyes on my son then on a screen and a keyboard. It means loads of work and lots of careful planning around the house. It means moving furniture and babyproofing the house but... it's OK. I don't think I ever want to stop my son from discovering stuff. More on discovery later.

BabyD took his first steps in his walker yesterday. Coincidently, it was his 6month birthday. Alhamdulillah he is six months old... walking... talking (if only a few words)... eating(almost all vegies and fruits) ... crawling and curious about the world around him. Alhamdulillah he isn't anxious around strangers... infact he loves people and going out. more later

I came online to blog... and then BabyD throughs a tantrum... it's been on for.... 3hrs now!!

There is a fun in blogging from bloggar that I had been missing. The last time I used it... blogger had updated to new blogger and I was having problems publishing. The new version is out and downloaded on to my laptop....Now... I blog nonstop! (hopefully)

Oh btw, babyD turns 6months next week... he is progressing to active crawling and has become quite naughty!


err... where's the title field? never mind...

BabyD at almost 5months

If there is one thing that I can really say that I have learned from pregnancy and after the birth of BabyD ,then it is that I have learned to love and respect my parents even more than I have ever loved them before. It is really amazing how they managed to bring us up so well! I realise this every day, every hour of the day that I spend with BabyD. I pray I raise him well but as the days pass by and D learns new things I find myself really wondering...

BabyD is learning many new things. He now turns over more easily and is practising his pre-crawling and he is getting curious about the world around him. I know that moving forward on his tummy doesn't make him 'mobile' but I am already facing trouble. I can't leave him on the bed or on the carpet or even his rocker. He has learned to get out of his rocker and roll off the bed and when he is on the carpet, although he still doesn't have a pincer grip, he still manages to grab something or the other. Everything edible or otherwise goes into his mouth. He doesn't care if it fits into his mouth or not, he just has to try and have a taste. Sometimes I find it funny to watch him so desperately trying to put his beach ball into his mouth but most of the time, I am the one who is desperately trying to keep everything out of his reach.

BabyD has learned to laugh out loud too and believe me it is by far the most beautiful sound I have ever heard. I can keep on tickling him or making faces all day just so that I can hear his laughter. More recently he has learned to be more social, he now knows when I am joking or trying to make him laugh and what's more is that he sometimes tries to make me laugh too. Especially during feeding times, he looks up at me with a grin and a naughty look in his eyes and when I smile back, he laughs and then quickly gets back to having his milk. After a few seconds he again looks up and laughs and when I laugh back... he resumes. This continues for as long as I have the time or he has the moods. He has learned to reach up and touch my face and when I am sitting with him in my lap talking to him or someone else, he reaches up to put his fingers on my mouth as if trying to see how I talk. If he is standing in my lap, he puts his fingers in my mouth and starts to laugh which in turn makes me laugh and we both keep giggling together.

But more recently, BabyD has learned to shout and scream and that is what alarms me. At first, we didn't mind him screaming because he had only just discovered that he could scream. In a way it was like he had discovered his voice. We kept him going and encouraged him to shout or call someone. BabyD would often scream and make noise while with his dad and I didn't mind it because I thought it to be 'father and son' time and well, I didn't think it right to tell Z how to play with his son. But now, we are both alarmed because we have found BabyD to be screaming when he is angry or irritated. D wants us to carry him around or hold him into a standing position all the time. Yesterday, I was busy in the kitchen and had to put him in his rocker or on his tummy. At first I thought he was playfully shouting but then after sometime I realised that he was angry and was actually screaming to ask me to pick him up. I picked him up and calmed him down. I had to carry him around the rest of the afternoon. He did the same thing again in the evening and even Z agrees now that BabyD is throwing a temper tantrum. I hope that it is just this once that he did that and that he doesn't do it often. How do you tell a baby to not scream? He is still too young to understand 'no' and there is no reasoning with him. I am just so scared that it may become a habit. Last night at dinner I put D in his seat and he started to scream. Z came in just then and told D in as stern a way as he could to stop that. D thought it funny and started laugh as though Z was playing with him! We both stared at him before bursting into laughter ourselves. Clearly, it is not going to be easy. There is no reasoning with a baby.

BabyD has learned to play on his own too. That is, when and if he is in the mood. He now looks at his toys more closely and turns them over and feels them and of course, puts them in his mouth to taste them too. He can now differentiate between colours and I have found him many a times putting his hands on colours that match. He looks at them to and fro patting on them. Last week, I found him putting his hand on the bed sheet. The bed sheet has alternating boxes of patterns of different colour and D would keep on putting his hand on one pattern and then looking for the match and then putting his hand on the exact same pattern. At first I thought it was a coincident but when he kept looking at both the patterns and putting his hands on them and continuing to search for others that looked like it, I was sure that he was matching them. I haven't read any where that babies at his age can do that and I have been too busy to ask Joey about it.

I sometimes think that BabyD is hyperactive. But then again, I am sure most mothers of toddlers think that way about their children. D cannot sit still at all. I wonder how it will be after he starts to actively crawl or when he starts walking... Uh OH!! I am disturbed by the thought already!

D loves to go out. He has learned to say Vroom Vroom and Zoom Zoom and it is just the mention of the word 'car' and he starts. He sits in his rocker ( which by the way doubles up as his car seat also) and goes Vroom Vroom for so long that he drools and spits all over his shirt. No matter how many times we tell him to stop it... his car just doesn't run out of gas!

While there are babies who bring their parents to tears over bath time, my son loves to take a bath. We have just to mention 'bath time' before he starts going boo boo. D bathes at night before going to bed. It is a part of his bedtime routine. Sometimes Z and I get so tired that we want to skip out the bathing but D remembers and as soon as we mention that it is 'sleepy time', he reminds us to boo boo him. He bounces and gets so excited that we forget how tired we are.

Z was asking me a few days ago as to what it is that I really taught BabyD so far that I can count as really teaching him something. I think, I taught my son to get up in the morning with a smile. :)

9months to BabyD

Today I have the time to sit and write. Where was I the past few days? Uncle2D had come over and we were all very busy trying to update each other on what's new in our lives and then play with D too. D is crazy about his uncle… when I say crazy, I mean really crazy! D doesn't remember his bedtime or his nap time or that he is hungry when he is around his uncle. He may suck on his hand if he is hungry, rub his eyes when sleepy but still continue to play with his uncle. Uncle2D bought BabyD another bear, Benny Bear, and he has bought him one big ball which we have named as Poo Ball and he has The Three Tennis Balls which we call Tibbs. D loves wrestling with Benny, carrying his big Poo ball around and holding Tibbs close like a doll. He is so crazy about his new toys that he even sleeps with them.

We were afraid that BabyD had developed stranger anxiety when we found him not taking too easily to his GrandmaT but now we know that he likes some people and dislikes a few others. I know that I need to teach him to love her but I am really not sure how to make him like her. The past two weeks I have been calling her to my place almost on a daily basis and the days when she can't come over, we go to her place. I want BabyD to like her and she is trying everything that she can to make D like her but we are still having trouble.

Here is the update on Nine months to babyD.

A week before Baby D was born, I had moved to my apartment to stay with Z. Z's office is closer to our place and he couldn't come and stay with me at my parent's house. Z was having trouble trying to juggle home and work and I thought that I could handle myself at my place but after only a few days I found that I was getting cramps and we worried about early labor. The day before BabyD was born, Z dropped me off at my parent's place while on his way to work and I stayed there chatting, joking and giggling with/at Joey. It was a normal day, nothing unusual. We discussed about how we wanted to arrange the nursery and what theme we'd keep; we argued about baby names all day with Joey bent on naming her nephew D and threatening us if we named him anything else and we packed my hospital bag. Z had asked me to take my hospital bag along with me when he left me at mom's that morning. He had asked me to finish packing it. That evening, I packed it up and put in all the 20 or so things my mom had asked me to put into the duffel bag that I had decided to take to the hospital. In the evening around 6pm my parents went out shopping. Mom wanted to make cloth nappies and jhablas for the baby. We weren't sure if we would ever use them but we wanted to do everything, traditional and modern, that could be done for the baby. My mother was becoming a grandma for the first time and she wanted to put in her two cents (they are worth way more than that!). Mom and Dad went out, Joey and I stayed at home watching Spacetoon. Z came home around 7pm and after he had dinner we decided to go back to my place. Mom and Dad had still not come in and it was 9pm then. It was getting late and I ached all over. I was too tired to even carry my purse and so I thought it better to give the hospital bag to Joey. At the door, I gave her the bag and told her to bring it along if I called to say that I was going to the hospital.

On our way home, I suddenly felt too tired to even sit in my seat. We reached home a few minutes later and I sat there waiting for Z to come over to my side to open the door. It was a ridiculous idea to wait for him… desi guys don't like opening doors for their women! Once home, I took off my abaya and decided to go to bed but then changed my mind and decided to look at the symptoms for labour in the What To Expect When You Are Expecting book. Z came in and found me flipping through the book. I told him that I was getting cramps and that I was looking to see if that was normal. He asked me to call the doctor just to be sure and although I didn't want to call her (it was anything serious), I called her up. I told her that I was having cramps and described to her exactly what I was feeling. She asked me if I had counted the baby kicking and I told her that I hadn't. She asked me to come over just to have a routine check. I was too tired and didn't want to go but Z was adamant and he called up my mother to ask what we should do. She wanted me to go to and after a few minutes of arguing, Z convinced me that we should go. I called up Joey to tell her that we were going to the hospital. My mother had still not gotten home and when Joey heard that I was going to the hospital she naturally assumed it was 'time'.

On the way to the doctors clinic, in the car, I noticed that the baby wasn't kicking or moving. It always kicked around furiously whenever we went for a drive and I was surprised that I could sit so comfortably this time. I then remembered that I had eaten chocolates two to three hours ago and even that jolt of sugar hadn't energized him to get active. That is when I started to panic… I hadn't felt my baby move for four hours!! At the clinic, I told Dr. A what I was feeling and she proceeded for a USG. After half an hour of trying to get the baby to move, she gave up and said that it was no use wasting time. She said that if I didn't deliver my baby in four hours, I could lose him. I had a low lying placenta, the amniotic fluid was low and the baby was under stress. She said that I needed an emergency C-section. We were asked to check into the hospital right away. I tried making excuses to not have the baby that early. I was sure the baby would move and that everything would be well. It was 11pm then and I hadn't even had my dinner. I was too disturbed and had decided to eat later. All that I had had was two sticks of Twix. Once outside the doctors clinic, I told my mother that I didn't have the hospital bag ( as if I needed it right then!) and so we couldn't go that day. Joey quickly responded with 'I didn't forget to bring it. It is the car'. I had never been so annoyed at my sister my entire life as I was that day. I couldn't believe it; these people were really going to get me to have my baby that night.

At the hospital, we checked into OB-GYN emergency and had three different doctors and two nurses take my BP and ask me about my allergies and medical and family history. I was then taken to the delivery room where I changed into the hospital gown and was then strapped to the foetal monitor. The anesthesiologist came in then to ask me the same questions that I had already answered two to three times earlier. He asked me when and what I had eaten and if I had any questions. I asked him some questions and I must say he knew his work well. We waited for two hours to see if there was any change in the foetal movements. I felt only four movements in two hours. The chief of OB-GYN came in with my doctor to discuss if I really needed the c-section. Then another doctor came in and they argued and debated for sometime. It was then decided that we'd wait till morning.

I was moved to a room then but still strapped to a foetal monitor but this one was counting the baby's heart beat too. Dad and Joey were sent home to have dinner and some sleep so that they could come in the morning. There was no point in worrying. Z and mom stayed with me. Z had been up quite early that day and he had dark circles under his eyes. We asked him to sleep on the adjacent bed in my room and mom and I stayed up talking. It was 2am when I was wheeled into the room and the doctor had said she would come at Fajr. Fajr was at 5.30am. Mom and I chatted trying hard to cheer each other up but it was clear that we were both worried. We both kept praying. She for her daughter and I for my unborn son. The foetal monitor showed that the baby was not moving the first hour but the after 3am the baby suddenly started kicking and moving quite vigorously and his heart beat was too high. When the doctor came in at 6am, she said that the baby was excited by the foetal monitor as this sometimes happened and has thus moved but it hadn't stirred after the foetal monitor had been shut down. She said that she would perform the operation at 10am. She went out of the room and Z followed her to ask her a few questions. A few seconds later, Z came back and said that I would be having the operation right away. He said that the doctor had changed her mind and as the operating room staff had informed her that they were ready, she had decided to do the operation right away and not risk taking a chance. It was 6.50am when I was wheeled in to the OR. I am surprised that I wasn't scared. I saw my mother and Z as I was wheeled out and they looked quite worried. Z had nervously smiled at me and given me the 'I am praying for you' look. I didn't know what to say to him so I just smiled back. In the OR, they moved me on to another table and then wheeled me somewhere else and then moved me to on to the operating table. I was pretty excited. I had never been in an operating room before or seen the inside of the operating theater. It was cool, really cool! Such big round white lights that changed to a pinkish greenish tinge. They reminded me of jelly fish. :D I was so excited I had wished I had my camera with me so that I could snap pictures to show to Joey. The nurses in the meanwhile strapped me to the ECG machine and they inserted an IV syringe in my left arm and I saw the anesthesiologist walk in in his green dress holding up his hands. I saw my doctor walk in too and she came up to me to reassure me that everything would be alright. Right then I was given something in my IV that really, really sting… I had started to say the ayatul kursi when I passed out. When I came to I was finishing saying the ayatul kursi, the difference being that when I had passed out it was so quiet but when I came too, I was hearing too many voices ( all speaking in Filipino and Arabic) and I was in too much pain. I was in pain, I was throwing up and I wanted to see my baby. I was told I had given birth to boy and that I couldn't see him for four hours. I was sick, in too much pain and add to that that they wouldn't let me see my baby... they were getting me angry. D was born at 7am. They wheeled me out at 9.30am and when they opened the door, Z was standing right in front. He came to my side asking me how I was doing and I told him I was in pain. Mom was also there and so was Joey and Dad. Soon Dad and Joey disappeared and Mom and Z came with me to the recovery room. Once in my room, I threw up there too and was given pain killers. I was also feeling very cold and shaky. Amidst throwing up and in my drowsy state, I remember asking Z if he had seen the baby. He smiled and said 'yes' and I asked him if he looked like him and he said 'yes' to that too. Joey came in then and showed me a picture of the baby on her cell and he looked quite a scene with his hair plastered to his head, eyes puffed, reddish complexion and wrapped in a blue shawl. I remember crying because he was so ajeeb looking. Mom scolded Joey for showing me the pic, dad said something and comforted me saying that the pic was bad and Z kept saying, "he is really cute. He is beautiful…" Sometimes during that the nurse came in informed us that the Director General had come to see me. We were all puzzled when a very good looking tall and handsome Saudi in his twenties walked in and asked me how I was doing and if he could do something for me. I told him I was sleepy and that I wanted to sleep… Everybody burst into laughter and (thankfully) left me to myself. Round 12pm, I woke up to find Joey taking pictures of me and my room and singing, "Joey bunny Aunny" . I would have thrown a pillow at her if it wasn't for the fact that I was quite comfortable with a pillow under me and that the throwing would have hurt me. I asked her if she had seen the baby and she proceeded to tell me everything about what all had happened since she got there that morning.

We called up the nursery to ask them to send the baby but they only said that they would be sending the baby after 2hrs. We waited and while we waited I worried and thought out loud:

'Joey, what if I don't like my baby?'

'I'll take it', she said.

'What if I don't make a good mom?'

'I'll adopt him.'

'What if he doesn't like me?'

'All babies love their moms. Besides, you are a lovable creature.'

Thank God for giving me a shrink for a sis. I wonder how I would have survived without her.
Dad came in around noon and they bought the baby in soon after him. Joey bought him to my side and dad picked up the baby and then put him in my lap. Z came in right at that moment and he stood there at the door with a smile on his face.

My first look at my son? He was beautiful! All I could say was… 'Assalamalaikum baby. I am your mom' and just then… he opened his eyes to look at me.

What's the feeling like? I don't know… I can't describe it. It is a memory.. A feeling that just cannot be described. A feeling that A will be experiencing very soon. A feeling that, I pray, is as beautiful for her as it was for me... InshaAllah, all will be well.